STUFF IN MARRIAGE
by Bob and Yvonne Turnbull
Turnbull Ministries - PO Box 650518
- Potomac Falls, VA 20165
It's the small stuff that can make a big
With Bob's recent spine/back episode we found that
it was the small stuff that we attended to that has enabled Bob to
repair so quickly and get back to functioning as usual. Things
like proper rest, stretching, exercising, taking a lot of nutrients,
seeking good medical advice, and of course all the great Emails you
sent as well as your faithful prayers. All of these things have
made a huge difference in Bob's life and journey to full
mobility. Thank you for the part you played in his recovery.
As we were thinking about all the small things done
in his recovery we also thought about it in terms of a marriage
relationship. Oftentimes we've noticed that it's the "small
stuff" in marriage that can cause us to become irritated with our
spouse. Like the socks that are always left on the floor, or
constant nagging, or nearly empty juice containers put back in the
Since we know that those small things can
leave such a negative impact in the marriage we decided to do something
to counter the negative "stuff." We decided to do a number of
positive small things for each other daily. We're taught in Prov
3:27 - "Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in
your power to act." Our mate does deserve it.
Here is some of the "small stuff" we do in our
**We laugh together. A lot. Daily. We
look for things like cartoons, funny Emails, funny movies we can watch
together, as well as we've learned to be more playful with one
another. Yes, there is much sorrow and sadness out and about, and
we are aware of that, but we focus a lot on the joy and humor
that is also out and about. As the Bible teaches us, "A cheerful
heart is good medicine."
**Each day we let one another know at least one thing
we appreciate about each other, and we can't use the same one every
day. We actively look for what is right with one another.
It sets a great atmosphere in our marriage.
**We say "I love you" many times and in a variety of
ways. We say it orally as well as we write it. We leave
love notes around the house and even have spelled it with
"cheerios.' We let our creative juices flow.
**We try to speak to one another as if we were speaking
to a stranger - meaning - with a pleasant tone of voice and using
common courtesies like ‘please' and ‘thank you.' Sadly, too often
we are more polite to strangers then members of our own family.
We are often sad to see and hear how some married couples speak to each
another, and often in public. When that happens we usually
observe hidden anger and resentment.
**We pray together every day. We seek God's guidance and
wisdom as we start our day, and give thanksgiving to Him before we go
to sleep. This has made a major difference in our marriage as we
see how God has been melding our heart's together to truly become
These small things have set a positive tone in our
marriage and we are reaping the benefits. Plus it has helped us
to not take each other and our marriage for granted as every day we are
turning our thoughts and actions towards the other.
What are the "small stuffs" you do in your marriage
that has made a difference? (BTW, Email us and let us know and
with your permission we would like to include them in a future
newsletter Emailing.) What are some things you could start
to do if you haven't already? Remember, "Don't sweat the small
stuff," but do remember to do those special small things for each other
Phone: 703.406.8787 - Fax: 703.406.8876
Email: firstname.lastname@example.org - www.turnbullministries.org