Redneck one-liners
-How do you know when your staying in a
redneck hotel?
-When you call the front desk and say, "I gotta leak in my sink," and
the
person at the front desk says, "go ahead."
-Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking age
certain states
to 32? It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools.
-What do they call reruns of "Hee Haw?"
A documentary.
-How many rednecks does it take to eat a deer?
Two. One to eat and one to watch for traffic.
-Where was the toothbrush invented?
Arkansas. If it was invented anywhere else it would have been called a
teethbrush.
-A cop pulled over a pickup truck. He asked the driver, "Got
any ID?"
The driver says "Bout what?"
-Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Oklahoma Lottery?
The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.
-Why did O. J. Simpson want to move to Arkansas?
Nearly everyone has the same DNA.
-Did you hear that the Governor's mansion burned down?
Yep. Pert' near took out the whole trailer park.
-What do a divorce in Arkansas, a tornado in Oklahoma and a
flood in Mississippi have in common?
Somebody's fixin' to lose a trailer.
-A redneck came home and found his house on fire. He rushed
next door,
telephoned the fire department and shouted, "Hurry over here! My house
is on fire!"
"OK," replied the fireman, "How do we get there?"
"Shucks, don't you still have them big red trucks?"
-Why do rednecks go to the movie theater in groups of 18 or
more?
Cuz 17 and under ain't admitted.
