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Rules of the road, Indian style
- Traveling on Indian Roads is an almost hallucinatory potion of sound,
- spectacle and experience. It is frequently heart rending, sometimes
- hilarious, mostly exhilarating, always unforgettable.
- Most Indian road users observe a version of the Highway Code based on a
- Sanskrit text. These 12 rules of the road are published for the first
- time in English:
- ARTICLE I: The assumption of immortality is required of all road users.
- ARTICLE II: Indian traffic, like Indian society, is structured on a
- strict caste system. The following precedence must take place at all
- times. In descending order, give way to: cows, elephants, heavy
- trucks, buses, official cars, camels, light trucks, buffalo, jeeps, ox-carts,
- cars, motorcycles, scooters, auto-rickshaws, pigs, pedal rickshaws,
- goats, bicycles (goods-carrying), handcarts, bicycles (passenger-carrying), dogs, pedestrians.
- ARTICLE III: All wheeled vehicles shall be driven in accordance with the
- maxim: to slow is to falter, to brake is to admit defeat. This is the
- Indian drivers' mantra.
- ARTICLE IV: Use of horn (also known as the sonic fender or aural amulet):
- CARS 1. Short blasts (urgent) indicate supremacy, i.e. in clearing dogs,
- rickshaws and pedestrians path. 2. Long blasts (desperate) denote
- supplication, i.e. to oncoming truck: "I am going too fast to stop so
- unless you slow down we shall both die". In extreme cases this may be
- accompanied by flashing of headlights (frantic). 3. Single blast
- (casual) means: "I have seen someone out of India's 950 million whom I
- know" or "There is a bird in the road (which at this speed could go
- through my windscreen" or "I haven't blown my horn for several minutes."
- TRUCKS AND BUSES All horn signals have the same meaning, viz: "I have an
- all-up weight of approximately 12.5 tons and no intention of stopping,
- even if I could." This signal may be emphasised by the use of headlights.
- (Article IV remains subject to the provision of the Order of Precedence
- in Article II above)
- ARTICLE V: All manuevers, use of horn and evasive action shall be left
- until the last possible moment.
- ARTICLE VI: In the absence of seat belts (which there is), car occupants
- shall wear garlands of marigolds. These shall remain fastened at all times.
- ARTICLE VII: 1. Rights of way: Traffic entering a road from the left has
- priority. So has traffic from the right, and also traffic from the
- middle. 2. Lane discipline (VII, I): All Indian traffic at all times and
- irrespective of direction of travel shall occupy the center of the road.
- ARTICLE VIII: Roundabouts: India has no roundabouts. Apparent traffic
- islands in the middle of crassroads have no traffic management function.
- Any other impression should be ignored.
- ARTICLE IX: Overtaking is mandatory. Every moving vehicle is required to
- overtake every other moving vehicle, particularly if it has just
- overtaken you.
- Overtaking should only be undertaken in suitable conditions, such as in
- the face of oncoming traffic, around bends, at junctions and in the
- middle of villages/city centers. No more than two inches should be
- allowed between your vehicle and the one you are passing -- and one inch
- in the case of bicycles or pedestrians.
- ARTICLE X: Reversing: no longer applicable since no vehicle in India has
- reverse gear.
Courtesy of TGIF
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