- MICROSOFT TV DINNER PRODUCT INSERT
- You must first remove the plastic cover. By doing so you agree to accept
- and honor Microsoft rights to all TV dinners. You may not give anyone
- else a bite of your dinner (which would constitute an infringement
- Microsoft's rights). You may, however, let others smell and look at
- dinner and are encouraged to tell them how good it is.
- If you have a PC microwave oven, insert the dinner into the oven. Set
- oven using these keystrokes: <\mstv.dinn.//08.5min@50%heat// Then
- If you have a Mac oven, insert the dinner and press start. The oven
- set itself and cook the dinner.
- If you have a Unix oven, insert the dinner, enter the ingredients of
- dinner (found on the package label), the weight of the dinner, and
- desired level of cooking and press start. The oven will calculate the
- time and heat and cook the diner exactly to your specification.
- Be forewarned that Microsoft dinners may crash, in which case your
- must be restarted. This is a simple procedure. Remove the dinner from
- the oven and enter ms.nodarn.good/tryagaingain/again.crap. This process
- have to be repeated. Try unplugging the microwave and then doing a
- reboot. If this doesn't work, contact your
- hardware vendor.
- Many users have reported that the dinner tray is far too big, larger
- the dinner itself, having many useless compartments, most of which
- empty. These are for future menu items. If the tray istoo large to
- in your oven you will need to upgrade your equipment.
- Dinners are only available from registered outlets, and only the chicken
- variety is currently produced. If you want another variety, call
- MicrosoftHelp and they will explain that you really don't want another
- variety. Microsoft Chicken is all you really need.
- Microsoft has disclosed plans to discontinue all smaller versions of
- chicken dinners. Future releases will only be in the larger family
- Excess chicken may be stored for future use, but must be saved only
- Microsoft approved packaging.
- Microsoft promises a dessert with every dinner after '98. However,
- version has yet to be released. Users have permission to get thrilled
- Microsoft dinners may be incompatible with other dinners in the freezer,
- causing your freezer to self-defrost. This is a feature, not a bug.
- freezer probably should have been defrosted anyway.
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