GRIT (Girls Raised In Texas )
Someone once noted that a Texan can get away with the most
awful
kind of insult just as long as it's prefaced with the words, "Bless her
heart" or "Bless his heart." As in, "Bless his heart, if they put his
brain on the head of a pin, it'd roll around like a BB on a 6-lane
highway."
I was thinking about this the other day when a friend was
telling
about her new transplanted northern friend who was upset because her
toddler is just beginning to talk and he has a Texas accent. My friend,
who is very kind and, bless her heart, cannot do a thing about those
thighs of hers, was justifiably miffed about this. After all,
this
woman had CHOSEN to move to Texas a couple of years ago.
"Can you believe it?" said her friend, "A child of mine is
going to be "taaaallllkkin liiiike thiiiissss."
Now, don't get me wrong. Some of my dearest friends are
from the
North, bless their hearts.. I welcome their perspective, their
friendships, and their recipes for authentic Northern Italian
food.
I've even gotten past their endless complaints that you can't find good
bread down here. And the heathens, bless their hearts, don't like
cornbread!
I have a friend from Bawston, bless her heart, who thinks
it's
hilarious when I say I've got to "carry" my daughter to the doctor or
"cut off" the light. She also gets a giggle every time I am "fixin" to
do something. And, bless their hearts, they don't even know where "over
yonder" is, or what "I reckon" means!
My personal favorite was my aunt, saying, "Bless her
heart, she cain't help being ugly, but she could'uh stayed home.."
Texas girls know bad manners when they see them:
1. Drinking straight out of a can.
2. Not sending thank you notes.
3. Velvet after February.
4. White shoes before Memorial Day or after Labor
Day.
5. Blowin your nose at the eatin
table.
6. Your Man leaving the table to pay the bill before
you finish eatin.
Texas girls always say:
1. "Yes Maam."
2. "Yessir."
Texas girls have a distinct way with fond expressions:
1. "Yawl come back."
2. "Well, bless yer harrt."
3. "Drop by when ya can."
4. "How's yer mama?"
5. "Love yer hair."
Texas girls know their three R's:
1. Rich
2. Richer
3. Richest
Texas girls know everybody's first name:
1. Hunny
2. Darlin'
3. Shuger
Texas girls know the movies that speak to their hearts:
1. "Gone With the Wind"
2. "Fried Green Tomatoes"
3. "Driving Miss Daisy"
4. "Steel Magnolias"
Texas girls know the three deadly sins:
1. Bad hair
2. Bad manners
3. Bad blind dates
G.R.I.T. = Girls Raised in Texas !
Now you run along, Shuger, and send this to ANY females
aspiring
to be GRITS--Even the northern ones, "Bless Their Hearts". and send it
on to men who think Texas women are precious.
Just because you move to Texas does not make you a Texan.. After
all, if a cat had kittens and moved them to the oven, that wouldn't
make them biscuits."
