Just Who Can One Trust Anymore?
A burglar needing money to pay his income taxes decided to burgle the safe in a store. On the safe door he was very pleased to find a note reading, "Please don't use dynamite. The safe is not locked. Just turn the knob." He did so. Instantly a heavy sandbag fell on him, the entire premises were floodlighted, and alarms started clanging. As the police carried him out on a stretcher, he was heard moaning, "My confidence in human nature has been rudely shaken."
Perhaps Heaven and Hell are Like....
In Heaven, the cops are English, the mechanics are German, the cooks are French, the lovers are Italian, and the whole place is run by the Swiss.
In Hell, on the other hand, the cops are German, the mechanics are French, the cooks are English, the lovers are Swiss, and the whole place is run by the Italians.
"If you get up early, work late, and pay your
taxes, you will get ahead - if you strike oil."
- J. Paul Getty
George W. Bush's
Inaugural Address Song
(to the tune of "What a Wonderful World" by Sam Cooke)
Don't know much about history
Don't know much foreign policy
Don't remember how I got through school
I'm sure I didn't break the rules
But what's it matter 'cause my granny says
"Boy, if you want to you can be the prez
And what a wonderful world this will be"
Don't know much about the women's vote
Don't know much about the bill I wrote
Don't know much about the foreign vets
I've never voted for 'em yet
But I do know if your dad tries hard
He can get you in the National Guard
And what a wonderful place that can be
Now I never claimed to be an A student
But what's wrong with C's?
And maybe by knowing the names of my cabinet
I can win their love for me
Don't know much about air pollution
Don't know much about the constitution
Don't know much about th'economy
It never much affected me
But there's one thing that I know for sure
If the rich stay rich and the poor stay poor
What a wonderful world this will be
Don't know much about the national debt
I've never had to pay one yet
If we need to we can sell the States
To the Japanese at discount rates
But I do know if things get bad
Dick and I can always call my dad
And what a wonderful world this will be
&&&&&&&&&&& - Dennis Fahringer - email@example.com
Those Were The Days....
One day at the family reunion, my grandparents were reminiscing. My grandfather remarked, "I wonder what ever happened to the old-fashioned girls who fainted when a man kissed them."
Grandmother gave him a withering look, "What I'd like to know," she said, "is what happened to the old-fashioned men who could make them faint!"
C Chr'n Ministries & Churches
R Referrals & Reconciliation
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