10) You open up your Bible in church and a huge dust cloud rises.
  9) You think Abraham, Isaac & Jacob may have had a few
     hit songs during the 60's.
  8) You open to the Gospel of Luke and a WWII Savings Bond
     falls out.
  7) Your favorite Old Testament Patriarch is Hercules.
  6) A small family of woodchucks has taken up residence
     in the Psalms of your Bible.
  5) You become frustrated because Charlton Heston isn't
     listed in either the Concordance or the Table of Contents.
  4) Catching the kids reading the Song of Solomon, you demand:
     "Who gave you this stuff?"
  3) You think the Minor Prophets worked in the quarries.
  2) You keep falling for it every time when Pastor tells you
     to turn to Second Opinions.

And the number one sign you may not be reading your Bible enough:

  1) The kids keep asking too many questions about your usual
     bedtime story:
                "Jonah the Shepherd Boy and His Ark of Many Colors."