TV nation Polls

(taken sometime in '94):




10% of the American public would pay $5 to see Senator Orrin Hatch (R-Utah) fight a big mean dog on Pay TV. 86% of all viewers would root for the dog. 100% of women viewers would root for the dog.

16% of Perot voters believe, "If dolphins were really smart, they could get out of those nets."

39% of Americans believe that guns are not "as dangerous as they say."

11% of Americans that suffer from indigestion would rather retake their SATs (skulastik aptidude test) than watch a Jesse Helms filibuster.

12.5% of Americans who voted for Clinton in '92 believe that they will someday be told "just what Victoria's Secret is." 98% of Bush voters believe they will never know.

14% of Americans surveyed agreed that Puerto Rico should not be the 51st state because "that extra star would make the flag look bad."

35% of Americans believe Richard Nixon went to heaven. 59% believe he went "someplace else."

Thank you, Jannie!

 

********************




The following, sent by Dennis Fahringer, is a direct quote from the Center for Strategic and International Studies report on Global Organized Crime.

The author swears it is true:

FBI agents conducted a raid of a psychiatric hospital in San Diego that was under investigation for medical insurance fraud. After hours of reviewing thousands of medical records, the dozens of agents had worked up quite an appetite. The agent in charge of the investigation called a nearby pizza parlor with delivery service to order a quick dinner for his colleagues.

The following telephone conversation was recorded by the FBI because they were taping all conversations at the hospital:


Agent: Hello. I would like to order 19 large pizzas and 67 cans of soda.
Pizza Man: And where would you like them delivered?
Agent: We're over at the psychiatric hospital.
Pizza Man: The psychiatric hospital?
Agent: That's right. I'm an FBI agent.
Pizza Man: You're an FBI agent?
Agent: That's correct. Just about everybody here is.
Pizza Man: And you're at the psychiatric hospital?
Agent: That's correct. And make sure you don't go through the front doors. We have them locked. You will have to go around to the back to the service entrance to deliver the pizzas.
Pizza Man: And you say you're all FBI agents?
Agent: That's right. How soon can you have them here?
Pizza Man: And everyone at the psychiatric hospital is an FBI agent?
Agent: That's right. We've been here all day and we're starving.
Pizza Man: How are you going to pay for all of this?
Agent: I have my checkbook right here.
Pizza Man: And you're all FBI agents?
Agent: That's right. Everyone here is an FBI agent. Can you remember to bring the pizzas and sodas to the service entrance in the rear? We have the front doors locked.

Pizza Man: I don't think so. (click)



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