Call Center Conversation
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Call Center Conversation

This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This
is  a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for 'Termination without Cause.'

Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I  know why they record these conversations!):

Operator:         'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'
Caller:              'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
Operator:         'What sort of trouble??'
Caller:              'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.'
Operator:         'Went away?'
Caller:              'They disappeared.'
Operator:         'Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?'
Caller:              'Nothing.'
Operator:         'Nothing??'
Caller:              'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'
Operator:         'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??'
Caller:              'How do I tell?'
Operator:         'Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen??'
Caller:              'What's a sea-prompt?'
Operator:         'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'
Caller:              'There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type.'
Operator:         'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'
Caller:              'What's a monitor?'
Operator:         'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??'
Caller:               'I don't know.'
Operator:          'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'
Caller:              'Yes, I think so.'
Operator:         'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller:              'Yes, it is.'
Operator:         'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??'
Caller:               'No.'
Operator:          'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.'
Caller:               'Okay, here it is.'
Operator:          'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.'
Caller:               'I can't reach.'
Operator:          'OK. Well, can you see if it is??'
Caller:               'No.'
Operator:          'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??'
Caller:               'Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark.'
Operator:          'Dark??'
Caller:               'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.'
Operator:           'Well, turn on the office light then.'
Caller:               'I can't.'
Operator:          'No? Why not??'
Caller:               'Because there's a power failure.'
Operator:           'A power .... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in??'
Caller:               'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'
Operator:           'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.'
Caller:                'Really? Is it that bad?'
Operator:           'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'
Caller:                'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??'
Operator:           'Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer!!!'

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